Sexual pleasure is a wellbeing issue at Healthista.com and we have discovered two female stimulating gadgets that you can use solo or with your partner to increase your own ‘Oh’ factor
We didn’t think we’d be writing ‘female stimulating gadgets’ in a headline any time soon, just like you probably weren’t expecting to read it. But sexual health isn’t only about avoiding STIs, it’s about getting the most out of how amazing, how empowered and how goddamn relaxed a good old-fashioned orgasm can make us feel. You can make the most of that whether there’s a man in your life or not.
only 25 per cent of women climax through sexual intercourse. Over half of us need clitoral stimulation too (or instead)
So only 25 per cent of women climax through sexual intercourse. That statistic comes not from just one study but from a comprehensive analysis of 33 studies over the past 80 years by Elisabeth Lloyd in her fascinating book The Case of the Female Orgasm: Bias in the Science of Evolution
(Harvard University Press).
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Clitoral stimulation equals more satisfaction
The rest? Well, about another 20 per cent will never have an orgasm. Those left are relying on stimulation of the clitoris to reach their peaks. This tiny organ at the top of a woman’s vagina, just underneath the meeting of the two outer lips (I know you know where yours is, but this is for the men reading) is kind of like the pointy protruding bit of an orchid (see below). It’s also the most sensitive organ of the female body with thousands of nerve endings attached to it. During clitoral orgasms, the most common type, waves and waves of sensual pleasure flood a woman’s body and the really intense ones can be felt throughout the body, right through to the fingertips. Sometimes you can feel like you’re about to be paralysed; crippled by pleasure for those perfect few seconds or – if you’re lucky – minutes, during an orgasm.
In my experience, this type of stimulation is probably the most reliable as I know eventually, with enough stimulation, I will have an orgasm and depending on where I am in my cycle, they might go on for minutes on end with up to three in the space of an hour. Vaginal orgasms for me only happen when I am either in the middle of my cycle or just after my period. Even then, it’s hit and miss.
Types of clitoral stimulation
When it comes to clitoral stimulation, there are three ways to get hmmm, how to say, from base camp to Everest’s Peak:
Mouth: If your partner is not quite hitting the mark, show them. Tell your partner what feels good and what doesn’t. He/she can’t know they’re heading in the right direction without a few navigation points from you. Once he/she gets it right the whole experience is incredible but the orgasm is so crazy amazing, it’s hard not to get hooked on the person doing it (or is that just me?).
Fingers: This is a great starting point whether you’re going solo or with a partner, as the clitoris is so sensitive. The key is to try different pressures and styles of movements (if you’re not sure, a clitoral massager, below, provides lots of different patterns of movements and can help you work out what you like. Keep the clitoris lubricated so you don’t get any pain.
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Sex toys: With a number of sex toys now available that stimulate the vagina and clitoris at once, we’re spoilt for multi-tasking choice. But sometimes it’s nice to really concentrate on the clitoris in order to get those multiple orgasms that are possible with the vibrating pattern that is just right for you. That’s where clitoral stimulators come in.
2 Clitoral stimulators we love
Here are two of the best from one of our favourite sex toy manufacturers, LELO. This Swedish outfit create innovative, discreet but superbly powerful women’s stimulating devices that deliver serious pleasure without looking like something your cleaner would be mortified to find.
Scented for pleasure: LILY 2
LELO is known for creating the world’s first scented sex toy. Now, in LILY 2 they’ve updated the clitoral vibrator so it comes in three different aromas: Lavender and Manuka Honey, Rose and Wisteria and Bordeaux and Chocolat in three respective colours, fuchsia, pink (left) and mahogany. The scents were specifically selected because they have aphrodisiac properties (for me, Bordeaux and Chocolat is the sexiest). For example, according to LELO, smelling lavender actually increases blood flow to the clitoris and penis, increasing arousal.
Dr. Ian Kerner, sex therapist and NY Times best-selling author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman by Ian Kerner says: ‘Sight, sound, touch, taste, smell are sensual pathways key to activating the arousal platform in women, and scent is a powerful, oft-neglected sense.’
Scent aside, the LILY’s a powerful clitoral stimulator with a blunt stimulation point whose vibrations can increase from soft and slow to hard and fast. This means it gets super-duper powerful, with hard vibrating pressure across the whole clitoral region, which I love. There are eight vibrating patterns that you cycle through from the two buttons on the underside of the device, so you’re spoilt for choice to find what works for you.
Don’t worry, the scent won’t make you taste any differently, we tried it and can assure you of that. In fact I tried them all and if I had one criticism, it’s that I got confused about how to get back to the power I liked, as my device seemed to get caught in the pattern modes, but after re-reading the instructions I was fine. I recommend LILY 2 for it’s given me as deep a clitoral orgasm as I have ever had with a sex toy. The last time I used it I managed three in about half an hour. It really does what it says on the tin.
LILY 2 is available for £115 from LELO.COM
Tiny and quiet but powerful: NEA 2
I love this gadget because it’s not only tiny, it’s as quiet as a mouse. Well, okay not a mouse but as far as vibrators go, it won’t bring the house down like some of them do or alert the neighbours that you’re not exactly using your electric toothbrush. One of my issues at first with this one was that because it vibrates so powerfully, I found it hard to keep the device where I wanted it. Because it was so small and light it was difficult to keep put on my target point if you get my drift. And because the NEA is not made of matt silicon like the LILY but glossy plastic, it seemed at first to slip. But once I overcame those little glitches and got the hang of it, the lightness became its best feature because I could control the pressure, while it did the vibrating.
While the NEA and the LILY are the most powerful clitoral massagers I have ever used, the NEA is better if you’re having sex with a partner as it’s small and quiet so its presence doesn’t really interfere with lovemaking like something bigger and more in-your-face could. It’s great used beforehand or even during, especially with him from behind. I love using this one in the shower too. Thankfully, it looks so discreet, I’m not even embarrassed about my cleaner seeing it!
NEA 2 is available for £85 from LELO.COM
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