She was tired, grumpy and emotional so what else was she to do but eat sugar-laden prawn crisps and a falafel kebab? 90 days of no sugar blogger and Healthista editor Anna Magee wonders how to deal with her emotions if chocolate isn’t on the menu
I want to be upbeat and positive about this. I really do. But this is tough. Yesterday I was tired. Knackered. It was one of those weeks where I felt I had given life every last bit of myself and I had nothing left.
I’d been out for two nights in a row – I know, party animal right? – had nursed deadlines and continued to face the tedious problems on Healthista’s business end with all the grace and professionalism I could muster.
But then my two brilliant interns, Alexa Tucker and Emma Reynolds who had worked with me since January as part of their degrees at Missouri School of Journalism in the US, finished on Wednesday night. I think I was harbouring a kind of hybrid Empty Nest/Office Syndrome and it tipped me over the edge.
When it comes to food, tired and emotional are my red zones. I can just about handle being one but when I am both, forget it. I need food for comfort, a lift and to make me feel better. Usually crisps and a Magnum almond does the trick. At the end of most weeks this and some junk telly used to be my little treat.
Yesterday, the office was still full of sugar but I didn’t have any of it. Good, right? Instead I went to Pret, picked up a pea and ham soup and crayfish thingie salad then got the the counter and realised I had left my wallet in the office. By the time I got back, climbed the 172 stairs up to the office (NOT joking) and come back down I was hungry, more tired, more emotional AND I had low blood sugar. I went to the greasy spoon across the road and bought a bag of prawn crackers (no, I didn’t read the label and yes, I could taste the sugar in them the minute I bit into one), a can of Diet Lift and – DO NOT JUDGE ME – a falafel kebab with houmous, chilli and just about every other sauce you can think of (I just kept saying ‘Yes please,’ whenever the guy asked me about the optional extras). It was wrapped in a fluffy white tortilla which I know like all white carbs reacts just like sugar in my system. I stuffed myself with it. I felt better for about 25 seconds. Four hours later I got more tired and emotional, came home and slopped on the sofa over two episodes of House of Cards. Now let’s forget it. I still didn’t eat chocolate. Small victory?
The real question is this: when I am emotional and tired what am I going to do? If I get a bit of bad news, have an argument with someone, feel I need some energy to think through a difficult concept I am writing about, hell if I look sideways, I often feel a little bit of chocolate would take the edge off. It does. Or at least it did. Now what? I am really not sure – other than writing it down and boring the poor old readers of this blog senseless with my feelings – how to cope.
Suggestions on a postcard please.
Read more No sugar for 90 days blogs from Anna Magee:
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